a little worse then terrible 2's plz help

breewashington08

I dnt like to complain bout my kids cuz they truely are my blessings. But my daughter has always been a fussy child. Even as a newborn she had reflux an cried all the time. At 4 months had meningitis. At 1yr old began having seziures. We took her to a specialist an she's been on a medicine for her seizures. She's not had a single seizure in over a year, so its obvious the meds are working....but she's always been a little more than a typical child her age.. she's always been kinda hard to handle. Tantrums. Screams. An now she's physical. This isn't becuz of a new baby, she's been like this long b4 I was pregnant. She's hit me, she screams. She's pushed my 3yr old down a flight of stairs. She tortures others kids.. she bit my 4week on the foot an left blood blisters. The other day he (the baby) was in my room napping and I found her wraping my fone charger cord around his neck. She won't sleep at night. I woke up one night to find her walkn the house an then anthr night I woke up to my dog whinning, she was pulling my dogs arms thru the kennel an hurting him. These aren't what I call normal 2yr old behaviors. An I hate to say I'm at my wits end. I love her so much but I get so frustrated I cry. Im reaching out for any and all suggestions that cld Mayb help tame some of her behavior. Again, this is not cuz she has a new baby brother. This has been goin on for awhile. An I do spend 1 on 1 time with her so I dnt feel like its for attention. Plz ladies....I dnt knw Wat to do

Also. Which I forgot to add.. when she does sleep she screams and fights in her sleep.. which could b why she don't want to sleep at all. Night terrors is what theyr calld.

jazzi89

yikes! I'm a ftm so idk if I'm helpful. But have you tried timeouts and maybe sitting down and asking her why she did that and calmly explaining y its sassy? Also maybe try to do little activities like coloring and maybe a sticker and prize chart for good behavior. Maybe you could get her to help around the house too and show her how to b a good helper? Sorry I'm useless in this topic lol

breewashington08

@jazzi89 actually Ur not useless. Lol no I hvnt tried a sticker chart. She does help me do little things. An I let her help with the banquet so Mayb she won't b so mean to him. We do time outs. But that's not getn us nowhere. The timeouts used to b a chair in the living room but her screams wld b so loud an it wld frustrate me more so I started doin timeout in her room. She wld shut her door an throw herself against the door, then she wld throw an break her toys... Timeouts don't work n I dnt wana spank her evry single time she's in trouble cuz she's in trouble alot

Mimii36

Have you tried a therapist? Sorry if that sounded harsh. Dont take it that way. Just a suggestion.

lae3

i wish i could help.. but.. thats a tough one.. all i can do is wish you luck and send prayers your way.. have you tried talking to a child psychologist.. to see if its normal behavior.. mabey her condition, or medicine is having a pshycological affect on her behavoir.. but im not a profetional by any means its just an idea..

breewashington08

@mimii36 Ur not harsh at all hun. An yes. Her Dr actually refferred me to a child physchologist I'm waitn to her bak. But in the mean I'm needing some help b4 1 of us end up in the crazy house. Lol

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breewashington08

@lae3 yes wer waiting to hear bak from a physchologist an I hav thought more than once that its possibly her meds making her act out like this.. and then thats another issue.. do I take her off the meds and risk her having a severe seizure or do I keep her on this medicine an risk her hurting herself or smebody else.

Mimii36

Dont take her off meds until you see the physcologist! But unfortunately idk what to tell you to do in the meantime. Thats scary. Hopefully the physcologist will contact you soon. If not...contact them or contact your own!

breewashington08

@mimii36 o I wld never take her off her meds til I talk to smebody. It is scary. I'm terrified she's gona do smthn to the baby. Lastnight I had him in his boppy on the couch, it was late an her an my older son was in bed. I was in the kitchen an I heard smthn an I came in an she was just standing ovr him. I swear its like smthn outa a scary movie the way she acts smetimes..

jazzi89

With timeouts I would stick to the chair in a corner and if she screams let her and tell her she's not getting up until she's quiet and apalogizes. If she gets up put her back in it. It may take forever but it works! My little cousin was awful and she finally got it lol. And when timeout is done explain to her what she did wrong and tell her to say sorry

mommy_2

That would scare the hell out of me.... she's acting like a lil evil possessed person, no offense, but u guys home isn't haunted or anything is it? I seen things like this on TV is y I asked... I'm sorry hun, I have nothing but I sure hope u find relief soon!

Mimii36

@breewashington08 yea I wonder the same as the girl above. Could your house be haunted? May sound crazy but I believe in that stuff.

MorgDeeBee

Maybe ask her doctor if its a possible side affect from her meds.

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Leggs2011

When I first read the post I thought exercism too. maybe see if a priest can come to your house? I believe in that stuff!

I'm a expecting ftm too so not much help. I just closed my inhome daycare, but nvr experienced bad kids like this.. if she was older id say boot camp.. but she's just a toddler.

Math_Mommy

I have a family friend who adopted her daughter @ 10 months. She began exhibiting severe agression shortly after her adoption. I babysat for her when she was between 3-6 years old, when her agression and tantrums were at their worst (i saw her lift and throw furniture twice her size across the room). The parents made the decision (at the reccomendation of the daughters therapist) to medicate her (with psychotropic medications), because she was a threat to herself and others. It took some time to get the medication dosage and combination right. Today, she is a beautiful, sweet-natured 12 year-old.

While this situation isn't identical, I hope it gives you some hope. I would contact the therapist monday morning and express how dire the situation is. If they cant get her in in the next few days, get another referral. In the meantime, do WHATEVER you have to to keep all your children safe, whether that means extra baby gates or having your daughter stay with relatives who have no kids for a bit.

I think as women and mothers, many of us don't like asking for help, like admitting we cant do it all makes us less of a person. But that's not true at all. Reach out to relatives or close friends. People are usually willing to help, if you express your need!

breewashington08

@mommy_2 @marinesangel @leggs2011 no lol I do not think my daughter is possessed. An no I don't think my house is haunted.. we've moved like 3 times since she's been born. We just moved to our current home 3months ago.
@navybabyonway I read the side effects when she first started taking the meds an violent behavior is one of the side effects. So I do believe it has a lot to do with her meds
@math_mommy thank u for Ur input u always hav such good advice. An Ur right as moms it is hard to reach out for help, as a mom I wana b able to do evrythng an provide evrything for my kids. Whn I'm not able to do that I do feel like I've failed in some way. I hav ask my mother to take her for a cpl days an my mom wont take her cuz she's to much for her to handle. An I hav a best friend who I've askd but then changed my mind cuz my friend has a 11month old daughter who my daughter has showed some aggression towards b4. Other than that I have nobody. I just don't knw Wat to do until I can get her into a therapist an we work smthn out. I'm loosing my mind

tinka1326

I dont really have any wise words other than maybe try rewarding her good behaviour and make a really big deal of it and try to give minimal attention to bad behaviour (obviously not when its serious things) my son is a little over 2 and started displaying bad behaviour towards his step sister and brother, pulling hair, biting, hitting etc if the other kids were not badly hurt I simply tried talking to him and asked the question 'would you like it if he/she did that to you' made him say sorry and left it at that, but when I caught him playing nicely gave him excessive praise, cuddles, kisses and treats and within a short time the positive behaviour outweighed the negative and now he very rarely displays aggression towards them. I know your situation is a bit different being that there are possibly underlying causes and you have a young baby to protect too but maybe this type of method with a sticker chart as well might atleast get her a little more in the right direction.

nameless

http://www.kristen-mcclure-therapist.com/bipolartoddlersymptoms.html


I don't really have any wise advise..I just thought this when you mentioned night terrors and very bad behavior..
as for time out the more she screams or messes around the longer she stays..it could 30mins of her sitting n time out till she clams down..
my sons in time out for awhile when he's not sitting quietly..
also rewards are great! and stickers
hope it gets better for you!

LittleFae

I think you need to take her to see a psychologist and look into her meds possibly causin this.
Also you might want to see if maybe she has something else going on lie aspbergers (spelling?) Or something like that
This is something you need t start doing asap before she hurts gerself or the new baby.
That is not normal behavior at all and if it is the.meds I would take her off and puy her on something else. Under a drs supervision of course

Beautiful_Altar

It definetly could be the meds. I was taking a strong antibiotic before that caused me to have panic attacks. I would also set up a meeting with a preist like @leggs2011 said. Just because of the night terrors.

Granny2B

I agree w others that trying a change in anti-seizure meds may make a big difference. Perhaps working w a doctor that works w a lot of seizure patients and is familiar w side affects and knows how to change medications smoothly.

Granny2B

Also, you mentioned that she has been more difficult since birth. Studies show that some children are just more difficult and need more care and intervention, which sounds like the case for your daughter. You are doing a good job working with her and getting help as needed. She is fortunate to have a mother that loves her and is working to meet her many needs.

KaylaThering

While I know they are not the identical situations I dealt with severe anger and violence from my now 7 yr old. She was about 5 when it started. She was more focused on hurting herself than others but would still lash out at me from time to time. She would sit in the middle of the floor and punch herself in the face and bite herself. She kicked me in the mouth hard enough to break 2 teeth. It is extremely upsetting to watch your child be so frustrated and angry and not be able to express it in a healthy way. We did the child therapy for a little over a year. I still have the crisis services number pre programed into my phone just in case. Best thing you can do is keep yourself and your youngest safe for now. And I know you're going to think I'm insane but if she ever starts getting to the point where you cannot control it and someone is going to get injured call 911. I know you're thinking. Wtf she's just a little girl. No. The emts will come and take her somewhere safe where a Dr can figure out the next course of treatment. I would call the therapists office back tomorrow and tell them its an emergency and she needs to be seen immediately. I know its tough but hang in there. And don't take her off her seizure meds.

Math_Mommy

My heart goes out to you and your daughter (poor girl has had such a rough start to life with the menengitis and seizures). I know firsthand how desperate it feels to have something going on with your child that you cant fix. All you can do is be your kid's biggest advocate...at which you are doing a great job!!!

It really sounds like her behavior is a side effect of her medication, possibly exacerbated by the new baby. In my limited experience, 2.5-3.5 year-olds have the hardest time dealing with big changes such as the arrival of a new baby. The good news is that if its her medication, there are tons of other options for anti-seizure meds. Any effect that her new brother is having on her behavior will eventually subside (acting out toward a new sibling is a survival instinct, and your daughter will realize that she's not going to starve and you aren't going to love and take care of her any less because of the new baby). 2 year-olds dont have the ability to rationalize their emotions. As a result, they act impulsively. The older she gets the better able she will be to find appropriate ways to express her feelings. Good luck Mama!

laura536

How long have you been waiting for the therapist to call? If its been longer than a week or so, I'd call back and stress that shes a danger to herself and others or make another ped appt so they can elevate your case. Because not only is she hurting others, you know she has to be miserable too. I would really push the issue with her doctor's to get her in faster. She definitely sounds like she needs meds or behavioral therapy. Good luck!

[Deleted User]

Could u speak to the doctor about trying her on s different med or altering the dose (sorry if this has been suggested already). Also I think the reward chart is a great idea maybe u could have good behaviour stickers and bad behaviour stickers so if she's naughty she gets reminded of it. Also you could try thumbs up thumbs down-when she's doing something good you give her a thumbs up, when she's naughty she gets a thumbs down.

Mallory27

How are her verbal skills? Does she talk well? I had a little boy in a class of mine he was 2 and his verbal skills weren't that great and his parents didn't want to get the help he needed ( I know its hard to think something is wrong with ur kid or they are behind ) but once he did get the help he needed and was able to talk more and express what he needed with someone actually understanding him it helped.

Also does she have any other socalization other then brothers and sisters and mommy and daddy? Friends outside of the house might help

Pinkigirl

Maybe the night terrors are not letting her sleep? I babysat a lil girl who was so violent! She bit her sister so hard she took off skin & her sister needed stitches. And that was only the worst I had seen (yes I was watching them when it happened). It turned out night terrors & a large tonsil were keeping her from sleeping. She had them removed & the night terrors stopped! A few months later she was a diffrent child. No fits, no outbursts, nothing! She was a difficult baby too. Have tonsils & adnoids(sp?) Looked at.

Alwayzbeenurz2008

Deff speak with her doctor to change the meds. I hope you can hold out til she can get it all regulated. I am a ftm so don't know to much but I do know meds can mess with people in crazy ways. Stay strong in your attempts to punish her for her actions. And good luck.