I think I am giving up. No judging please. :(

rjr33

I know bf is best for my daughter I know all the pros. I don't wanna be judged or lectured. I just don't think bf is working out for me and baby. Every feeding is a fight. She just isn't latching on right. I find myself dreading having to feed her. I am beginning to get angry and frustrated which I hate. She cries I cry. I am done. I am going to try and pump and feed but idk how that's gonna be. I feel bad but I am not enjoying being with my daughter and I don't want it to be like that. if pumping and feeding doesn't work does anyone know what type of formula I'd want to start with? Switching from bf to formula will it make her stomach upset?

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RTMommy

The whole point is to enjoy your baby. If you're miserable, do what you have to do not to be. Pumping is hard work, but if she takes the bottle with your milk easily, it's the next best option. As for formula, most people start on regular similac or enfamil as long as she doesn't have any feeding requirements. Ask her pediatrician where a good place to start would be. And yes, her tummy will have to adjust to formula, and she may become constipated for a few days with the switch. You'll figure out what works, honey. Don't stress.

rjr33

@RTMommy @kristaf22 @jdensma Thank you ladies. I hate that I dread feeding her. I don't think I am suppose to feel like that. I get so frustrated feeding her that I cry and wanna just walk away from her. I want what's best for her of course but bf is not working for us. I am gonna make a big effort to pump and feed her. I am scared to switch to formula and she gets sick or something.

RTMommy

Give pumping a shot, hon. She will still get your milk and you don't have to dread feeding her anymore. I will say the pump makes a huge difference though. Hopefully you have a good one.

MorgDeeBee

I started my daughter with a sensitive formula since it is harder to digest, she was constipated for a few days while she adjusted but then was fine.


You have to do whats best for you and your baby not what other people may think is the best.

rjr33

@RTMommy I have a first years double electric pump. I think it works pretty good. I hope I can do it. I have to feed her a bottle then pump everytime she eats right?

@MorgDeeBee Did you have to give her anything for her constipation?

Stillsurprised

I had the same problem with my daughter. No matter how hard I tried, she just wouldn't latch. I decided just to pump,.and give her formula. She got a few bottles of breastmilk a day and the rest formula. It didn't upset her stomach at all. After only got constipated when we switched her formula brand. You do what you think is best.

RTMommy

I was never able to BF my son, so I pumped every 2 hours to keep my supply up. Basically start pumping and you'll build up a stockpile in your freezer. Feed her fresh when you have it. You'll get the hang of it.

MyLove2

No it wont but if your concerned just use Similac Sensitive. You can switch between bottle & breast she'll still take the nipple.... From what im aware of...

LilliansMom

I had a similar issue except my lo latched on fine and fed great i had a great supply but bfing made me feel alone and very depressed and made me dread the next hour just anticipating her next feeding which was the opposite feeling that you should get since everyone says its supposed to be a bonding experience but for me it was the exact opposite. So at 4 weeks old I made the decision to quit and to do formula and personally it was the best decision I ever made....sorry I said so much but just saying you need to do what you think is right for you and your lo and I switched to similac advance and never had any problems

MorgDeeBee

No I didn't give her anything for it, it only lasted like 2 days then she was fine.

Ourlittlenugget

Did you ever see a lactation consultant to see if it was something simple? Some babies have trouble latching because of a tongue tie, and it's an easy fix. I'm pro-breastfeeding all the way, but not if it makes you both cry. ((((hugs)))) We support you feeding your baby - period. :-D

MichelleBelle

Out of curiosity have you tried using a nipple shield? With my first he wouldn't latch so I used it and he stopped using it on his own at 4 months old and we went on the breastfeed until 18 months. When my second was born I thought I was a pro and wouldn't need it but he wouldn't latch either and became dehydration so finally I popped on the nipple shield and sure enough he nursed like a champ and stopped using it at 5 months on his own and at 15 months is still nursing

rjr33

@MichelleBelle I have not tried one! Can you just get one at WalMart or something?

@Stillsuprised She did ok having both breastmilk and formula?

@Lilliansmom yeah I need to figure something out because I am miserable

@RTMommy Do you know how long fresh bm lasts at room temp? And if she eats half a bottle is it ok to give her the rest at her next feeding?

@ourlittlenugget no i haven't seen one yet. I might try to see one soon

Ourlittlenugget

I bet there's a lactation consultant at the hospital where you delivered. They'll see you! I also second the nipple shield. We used one the first couple days. :-)

RTMommy

I want to say it was @Mijita who had an easy way to remember BM safety at certain temps. Something about 5 hours out fresh, 5 days in fridge and 5 months frozen (deep freezer)...hopefully she sees this and corrects my mistakes hah

Bahamamama4828

Definitely could just be something simple. No one will put you down, it is ultimately your choice and its hard to parent when something isn't working for you. There are LCs at wic as well. Pumping is a pain, I did it for months with a preemie until he latched and my last one the first three months were awful! She was never happy but we stuck with it and figured out it was something in my diet. Good luck!

Proudmother1009

No one should EVER judge or put anyone down if they decide on formula, it makes you no less of a mother. You do what's best for your family honey!

Mijita

@RTMommy;

BM will last 5 hours at room temp, 5 days in the fridge and 5 months in a standard freezer. BM will last up to a year in a deep freezer because it doesn't get exposed to temp fluctuations, like a standard freezer does. Thawed milk should be used within 2 days as freezing kills many of its antibacterial components.

I know you feel at your wits end, but have you sought out a breastfeeding support group? They are free and filled with women just like you who are or have faced the challenges you've encountered. The support is beneficial and with knowledge comes power. If interested, contact your L&D ward and ask them for info on breastfeeding support groups. Believe me, they are wonderful. I only throw this option out there because I know many women here who regret not knowing their resources.

You will know what is best for you and your family. Don't let the judgment of others sway your decision. The first few weeks are the hardest, don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise!

You've done great! I commend you for making it this far, for all your hard word and continued valiant efforts.

KylieMommie

I use Costco brand formula.....baby loves it and cheaper than name brand.

MichelleBelle

@rjr33 I can't remember if I ever got one at Walmart, I may have. I know I bought one at Kmart and I agree that the hospital would probably give you one too. There are different sizes, I think 24 mm is standard. You just put it on and don't worry, its supposed to stick out a lot. The lactation consultant explained to me that the baby has a reflex way in the back of their mouth that needs to be touched to stimulate sucking and sometimes babies either are too weak to suck well yet or the nipple may be flatter so the nipple shield, because it sticks out touches that reflex and they want to eat so its nothing you're doing wrong Id give it a try if you do want to nurse. It's way easier than pumping