asking for help

ebbry89

So my 2nd baby is due at the end of November and I have yet to buy anything for the baby and its not because I don't want to but it's mainly because I get TANF and its not a lot when I have to buy stuff for my son because it seems like he grows or runs out of stuff rather quickly BUT anyhoo I have a heard time forming my lips to ask for help to buy anything for my child because I feel like hey I made the choice to have them so I have to pretty much have to do it alone but the month is going by quickly and I am really gonna need help buying some of the main things I need for the new baby I wanna ask my mom and my sister for help but I feel like they shouldn't help me with anything because I pretty much gotten into this on my own but I need help big time but I don't know how to ugh I'm so much like my dad I have too much pride but its too much to handle and I wanna ask my dad as well but I don't like his wife and she always has a problem with him doing anything for me and I'm his only child but he doesn't even let that deter him from helping me anyway but he is in the process of trying to move (he is moving from Kansas to Virginia where i am) where I live now so I'm not gonna ask him so how do I go about asking my mom for help even though I don't want to

[Deleted User]

Time to sit your pride to the side and start asking for help. Your little one will be here in no time so just go to your mom and tell her that you need help getting things for your lo. Will the amount of you check be increased after you have the baby?

baileygoose

Just tell her the truth, that you hate to ask but you have no other choice. Tell her you've been worried sick about what to do but have no other options but to finally ask her for help. Just be honest with her? What is tanf?

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ebbry89

Tanf is government cash assistance and it doesn't increase when you have more than one you get 320 a month that's the maximum and I would rather work that's why I have to hurry and drop this baby and get a job quick because 320 for 2 children ain't gonna help me do nothing...I know if I asked her she will not even say no and just ask what I need but it just kills me that Im not able to it myself...I hate not having a job been looking since may ugh!

baileygoose

That's tough, I'm sorry you're going through this. Would it be easier if you just asked her for a "loan" and once you're able you could slowly repay her?

CristinaLynn

Churches and clothing banks will help you with clothes and blankets. What you don't have and you do need just ask for help hun. This of course was your choice but everybody needs help and nobody should hold that against you. Call your local wic office too...they should have a list of programs to help you as well. If not them your local dshs office. But the churches and clothing banks will help so much!

ebbry89

Yeah I turned in my application for a carseat even though I still have my sons car seat but I didn't know if carseats have like a expiration date on them or what not and i never was in a accident with it so I'm gonna ask her I just don't know how to ask ... And she just sat here and brought a dang on 3 rd generation iPad lol

MyLove2

As long as it hasn't been over 6yrs then the carseat should still be good...is your carseat gender selected?

MyLove2

Do you know what your having?

ebbry89

Nope my carseat is unisex I love it its Mickey Mouse and I'm having a girl @aishamusa

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ebbry89

Okay thanks imma check the carseat in a few my sister already took the covers off so I can wash it

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BigBelly

Yes! They all have expiration dates.

EricaK22

Try going to a thrift store...they always have lots of girl clothes there..plus babies don't get dirty and tear their clothes up! There always cheap too. As for a car seat...try looking on craigslist for a new one that isn't expired.

ebbry89

Well my carseat is only a year old so I don't need one and I applied for a free one too and my mom is gonna help with getting a mattress for the play yard because I know I can't get a crib so ill just use what I have and I'm just gonna ask as I go along

MyLove2

Congrats yeah I would say also shop Walmart or Amazon they have alot of cheap stuff there. I always surf the internet for discount baby stuff. You'll have to get used to asking for help if you really really need it, it's for your Baby so it's worth it..

Steph_Due_101611

For my lo we use the pack n play with the mattress. My lo doesnt mind.

second_time_mommy7

Is there any way you could mention them throwing you a baby shower so its not like you are asking for them to buy everything? Everyone needs help sometimes and although you "have gotten into this on your own" it wasn't like you planned to get pregnant in this situation. Ask for help. When are you due?

second_time_mommy7

Do you have anything for her? Where are you from?

ebbry89

I did bother asking for a baby shower because I wasn't in the mood to celebrate another baby I shouldn't be having and I'm due November 30th and I plus I had found out in August I was even pregnant so it wasn't no point anyway and I don't want to take from anyone's holiday money. No I haven't brought anything for the baby yet and I guess it's because I'm still upset that I'm even pregnant again and I don't know what the hell to do with another baby since I struggled with the first one and I am from Virginia @second_time_mommy7

Steph_Due_101611

What all stuff do you need?

MyLove2

Deffinitely buy a pack n play they are WAY cheaper...and it's easy to put together and it's safe...

ebbry89

Everything lol I gave away all my son's stuff that I could have used and its a girl so I have to get stuff for a girl .. Atleast I have a car seat and a pack n play but I have to buy the other stuff

MyLove2

Well the good thing is the stuff that you have left to buy arn't all that expensive.. ;-)

ebbry89

Well it still expensive when you don't have a job and I have to buy enough to last me for awhile

natashalynn

Are you looking for clothes??