I want to be treated like an adult!!

edited November 2012 in Teen moms
So I just had this convorsation with my husband about giving me more responsiblity and I really didn't get much feed back. I talk n talk about how I'm tiered of being just a mom n not a wife. How I want to know how much money we have in the bank or when bills are due.
Idk I just think that its time for me to grow more in that department. Like I know maybe he didn't trust me at first but come on we are about to be 3 years n I also have mothered two kids n mange a house.
Idk what do you guys think? Should I just leave it to him or stand my ground on this one?

Comments

  • I think you should obviously have access to the account and know when bills are due! But I'm perfectly happy letting my husband take care of all the bills lol I'm very forgetful and it's only gotten worse since having a baby so it's just better for us that he does the bills.... Other wise they may never get paid. BUT I have full access to our account so when I go shopping (grocery or otherwise) I know how much I can spend.
  • I think it's crazy that you don't and your married my bf and I have same account I know everything when it comes to it and in charge of the money stuff in general. I don't see why you can't be part of it or know what is going on. Something you guys should talk about more I think
  • I understand that whole account thing but if my husband was willing to pay all the bills I'd be so happy 8->
  • I'm a sahm when my hubby gets paid every week he's check comes straight to me I handle all the bills and every sat we go shopping for food and stuff we need for r house. he never has $ ill put a couple dollars in he's wallet to have for wrk but other thin that he Works and I sort every thing out. we been together 8 years and always has Been this way even when I worked. as for u I'm sure if u help on paying the bills it well take a load off him to me its like a job cause I got add up all the bills and see how much we need this week that week yea but I dnt c y he wouldn't let u crazy how u dnt have access to he's account but every ones different
  • Hubby and I each have our own accounts but we know each others passwords. We both pay the bills but he does pay more because I work commission and I do all the house stuff.
  • how do u have the conversation of getting a "joint bank account" my bf needs to find an apartment by jan, and he cant get a bank account because hes maxed out too many.. hahaha (responsible i know) but now he keeps his money in his wallet, and he isnt a very good savor, any sudgesstions?
  • We have been married 5 years and ive habdled.to bills.the entire time....my husband forgets and he doesnt know how to pay bills. I work full time im a full.time mom as well i keep up with all the house work and dr appts and dogs i do everything but my husband is a marine and he well does marine shit...i prefer it to be this way bc im a control freak. I think you should be able.to.take care of your house and bills as a wife and mom.
  • @devins_mommy be honest with him. Let him know yoir concerned about his finances and make a suggestion about getting an account together so you can help him and "he can help you" he needs to know you dont think hes totally incompetent lol
  • We are like @mathair we each have our own accounts, but know each others passwords. It's not just my money or his, its our money. He pays the bills tho because it mostly comes out of his account and I pay for the groceries and gasoline for the cars. But yes, you should have some idea of how much money you guys spend or how much everything costs for you to live. You have a family to take care of and should have some responsiblity in your own home.
  • edited November 2012
    He tells me that he doesn't want me to worry Bout it. He said he just wants me to pay attention to the kids. But I'm tiered of just that. I love my babies don't think other wise but I want more responsibility. Yea I know it sounds stupid but yall must get what I'm trying to say. Like I just want to try to have more wife dues n not just mommy.
    @smcox
    @trixiesmom8
    @ripKaydence
    @devins_mommy
    @Máthair
    @char
    @Roxy
    @MyLove2
    @jules
  • edited November 2012
    Well some men still think the woman should stay home and take care of the house and kids. What r his thoughts on the subject? It sounds like he might be one of those men.
  • Yepp char is right..sounds like he's one of those guys.
  • Really dnt know cause his dad is like that but if he was like that he wouldn't tell me to go to school. He was even pushing it on me but I went into labor. But idk.
    @char
    @trixiesmom8
  • Well I know it's bad but I have friend who want really involved in finances well her husband ended up being freak packed everything left her with nothing.
  • @jules What an ass!!! He didn't love her at all if he left her over that.

    @cant_wait93 Being educated and actually working are completely differant things. Ask him if he could see you working after you finish school. Tell him you know it would be a couple years, but does he think you should work or be a stay at home mom.
  • if he's dads like that that's were he got it from.
  • Like father like son. Is he still pushing you to go?
  • Tell him you are his wife, the mother of his children, you are his equal and are entitled to having access and knowledge of your finances. Plus, God forbid, anything happens to him, you are not left completely lost on bills and how you are going to survive.
  • @char I agree! he was always little weird.
  • edited November 2012
    My husband and I have our own accounts as well as a joint account. He pays rent and I pay everything else...at one point we split it up equally but since I make more it make sense I pay more. I honestly would love to be a stay at home and have my husband pay for everything but that would never happen for me.
  • @char he told me that he wanted me to have a Career cause he said we never know what could happened.
    @jules I don't think that he would get that mad..well he hasn't gotten mad. He just tells me that I should focus on more important things like the babies n me. But idk.
    @trixiesmom8 he asked me the other day but he said it would be better when Delilah is like a year cause she is only breastfed. So my mother in law can take care of the babies. And his dad is worst! His dad makes my mother in law get up to get him anything.
    @LilliansMom yea its good but sometimes you feel worthless. Like if you have no say in anything.
  • Well u know him much better just seems odd to me personally. I mean it's not something that would take you away from the kids it's very simple to understand and if you ever had to pay Bill it only takes minute.
  • Huh maybe he really just doesn't want you to worry about bills.
  • Yea I know but I'm start pushing it now that we are getting a new place to move in till our house is ready I'm tell him to just test drive me. Lol @jules
    @char n yea like my life is pretty easy like this but I just want a say on things. Like if tells me well I have a lot left over this week I could know how much from where or why not only be like ok I guess..you know?
  • That's great idea I think!
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